When it comes to having a happy marriage, researchers have
found that getting hitched between the ages of 22 and 25
seems to be the sweet spot. That’s just an average, of course,
but the benefits outlined below mostly focus on “young” as
being one’s early to mid-twenties.
You (and those you date) will be carrying less baggage.
When you marry young, you and your wife have less exes, old
flames, comparisons, and retroactive jealousy of each other’s
past relationships to deal with. You can start life together with
more of the guileless freshness that lends itself to unabashed
and lasting romance.
You’re more likely to marry someone with whom you’re highly
A lot of folks put off marriage so they can shop around longer,
thinking that the more they look, the better chance they’ll have
of finding someone who’s just the right match for them.
You’ll have more sex (even years after you marry) .
Staying single may seem like a good way to keep the sexual
good times rolling. Yet surprisingly enough, research has
actually shown that married men have more and better sex
than their single peers.
You’re more likely to describe your marriage as happy.
A 2010 study found that couples who married between the
ages of 22 and 25 were more likely to describe their marriage
as “very happy” than couples who got married in other age
brackets. More sex may play a role as well.
You grow together.
It’s oft been noted that it’s more difficult to join two lives
together when each party has been living independently for a
long time, than when a couple starts out life together early on.
There’s actually a neurological reason behind that observation.
When you delay marriage, not only do you become more set in
your ways, but your brain’s a lot more set too. It’s definitely
still possible to hack relational “us” pathways through the
abundance of independent “me” trails that were deeply carved
in one’s adolescence, it’s just harder to do.
You’ll have an easier time navigating your 20s, and can be
more successful in reaching your professional and academic
First, a spouse can be a vital support as you finish your
schooling and embark on a career. During my undergrad years,
Kate edited my papers and helped me study for the LSAT.
During law school, she provided a much needed confidence
boost when summer internship offers weren’t extended, or
when I didn’t perform well on a final exam. In turn, I acted as
a sounding board for Kate as she worked on her master’s
thesis, helped her get organized and plan for her first teaching
job, and provided a helping hand when she got stressed during
both pursuits. Could we have made it through our 20s by
ourselves? Sure. But having each other’s backs certainly made
it a lot easier.
Marriage also helps you reach your career and academic goals
by providing stability and fostering focus. Socializing and
dating requires a lot of time, money, and emotional
bandwidth. When you’ve found your partner-in-crime, you’re
able to save your money and direct your energy towards your
other life goals. Indeed, studies show that married men in their
20s drink less and work harder than their single peers.
Your financial picture may improve.
A lot of folks put off marriage until they feel their finances are
sound, which in today’s world, is a goal that’s harder and
harder to achieve. As we saw above, financial issues can
indeed put a strain on young marriages. Yet such challenges
can be handled with maturity, and what may be stressful in the
short-term can work towards your long-term interests.
You’ll have an easier time having kids, increase their chances
of being healthy, and be better able to keep up with them.
While modern advances have allowed folks to postpone
having children, the reality is that both men and women have a
biological clock and having kids gets harder and riskier the
longer you wait. The research shows that children of older
fathers have increased risks for several physical and mental
disorders compared to children of younger fathers.
You don’t have to cram marriage, career, and kids into a few
Many put off marriage and children to focus on their education
and career, only to have all of these responsibilities
simultaneously, and stressfully, collide in their 30s. Pursuing
marriage, children, and career in successive phases, allows
you to enjoy each season to the fullest.